Retrograde Report for 18 September, 2023

There are currently 5 planets in retrograde:

Your Nerdy-Hippie Astrologer's Horoscope

Oh, star gazers! Let's talk retrogrades, shall we? And no, I'm not talking about repeating the fourth grade because you used your classmate's pet hamster to demonstrate gravity. I'm talking about planets doing the moonwalk across our celestial dance floor.

Now, Mercury is chillin' in Virgo, and it's like a super-nerd in a library. We're talking 'Bazinga!', Sheldon Cooper level here. Expect to feel a sudden urge to alphabetize your spice rack or colour-code your comic book collection. #MercuryInVirgo #BigBangTheory

Meanwhile, Venus is strutting its stuff through Leo like Beyoncé on tour. All that fiery energy might just make your love life hotter than a habanero pepper in a volcano. You've been warned! #VenusInLeo #HotInHere

And Mars, oh Mars! It's in Libra, trying to play peacemaker like a kindergarten teacher in a room full of sugar-high toddlers. Balance is key here, folks. Maybe use this energy to finally balance your checkbook? Just a thought. #MarsInLibra #BalanceIsKey

Jupiter is lounging in Taurus. Picture a big jolly giant reclining on a field, chewing on a blade of grass. Use this energy to enjoy the simple pleasures in life. Like eating an entire pizza by yourself. No judgment. #JupiterInTaurus #PizzaIsLife

Saturn is swimming in the dreamy waters of Pisces. Expect deep reflections and possibly existential crises in the shower. Why are we here? Is the universe a giant cosmic doughnut? The world may never know. #SaturnInPisces #ShowerThoughts

Uranus is also hanging out in Taurus. It's like a mad scientist at a farmer's market. Expect some radical innovations in your life, like finally figuring out how to fold a fitted sheet. #UranusInTaurus #MadScientistVibes

Neptune is in Pisces, its home turf. This is like a fish swimming in

The moon is currently in Scorpio, at 00 degrees, 32' 19", at a velocity of 12.35 degrees per day.

The Waxing Crescent moon is currently 2.9 days old. It is 393378.17 km from the centre of the Earth.

The next new moon is at 17:55:08, 14 Oct 2023. The next full moon is at 20:24:27, 28 Oct 2023.

Solar wind parameters suggested influence from a transient which aligns with the anticipated arrival of a CME that left the Sun on 14 Sep. An increase from background conditions began ~17/0150 UTC. Total magnetic field strength increased from 5 nT to a peak of 10 nT. The Bz component was mostly oriented far north for the event but briefly reached as far south as -9 nT during the onset. Solar wind speeds reached ~500 km/s near 17/0300 UTC and steadily declined to ~440 km/s by the days end.

There is a 25% chance of solar activity, with a 15% chance of a minor event, a 1% chance of a moderate event, and a 1% chance of a strong event.